Enjoy Your Walk in the Park

While we might not agree with the general idea of signs denying us the right to a bit of fresh air and exercise, there are certain times where such prohibitions are understandable. Like the above, found at the entrance to Redlands Mall.

The sign has the added bonus of being simple and to the point; they even went with the old-school big-NO-that-applies-to-everything design.

Not as simple as some of the terse commands plus iconography you’ll often find, however. Like this one, warning about overhead electrical wires

Granted, it’s a danger 35′ above the ground, but if you’re in a low-flying aircraft or working on a crane, you should definitely be on your guard.

(I also love the inches mark ready, just in case.)

Unfortunately, the simplicity of the Redlands Mall front door disappears once you’re inside, where this forboding sign greets you:

I’m rather surprised there isn’t a clerk at a desk nearby, taking signatures and blood samples. A closer look at the bottom:

Examples of specific activities that are not permitted include, but are not limited to:

• Disruptive profanity, vulgar or threatening language
• Unnecessarily blocking walkways, roadways or store fronts
• Running, horseplay or disorderly conduct of any nature
• Excessive loitering
• Operating unauthorized recreational and/or personal transportation devices in the shopping center
• No firearms or illegal weapons

Guests who do not act responsibly may be asked to leave. If they refused to leave the property, they may be arrested and prosecuted for criminal trespass.

Considering how few stores are left in Redlands Mall, never mind customers, I’m amazed they would go to so much trouble to keep people out. And excessive loitering? Is that staging sit-ins?

The main issue is not so much what’s forbidden, rather that it’s just too bloody complicated, a curse some sign makers suffer from. Like this fine example from Seccombe Lake Park in San Bernardino:

The Following Are Not Permitted

• Possession or consumption of alcoholic beverages.
• Private dumping.
• Loitering.
• Removing, destroying, mutilating or cutting of any tree, plant, shrub, bloom or flower.
• Cutting, breaking or defacing any public building or structure.
• Possession or discharge of firearms.
• Open fires.
• Overnight camping.
• Practice golf.
• Skating or bicycling.
• Horses.
• Dogs without leash.
• Harassment of wildlife.
• Indulging in riotous, boisterous or indecent conduct.
• Operating or parking any motor vehicle in non-designated areas.

And one for the taggers:

Pursuant to P.C. 594.1(d) it is unlawful for any person to have in their possession an aerosol container of paint larger than 6 oz. while in any posted public facility or park.

It’s astonishing that “Reading signs” and “Excessive smiling” aren’t on the list.

How about this one from Hulda Crooks Park in Loma Linda:

In summary, it is illegal to actually bring a small dog into the small dog area, and those scofflaws in the background can expect a visit from the authorities.

Bureaucrats love telling people what not to do, but when it comes to saying what’s okay, they completely disappear.

Compare the above ugly monstrosities to this wonderful counter-example found at Prospect Park in Redlands:

Pick up after the pooch
Use park trash cans
Leave flora and fauna as is
Keep the restroom clean

Enjoy Your Walk in the Park

Now isn’t that lovely?

Modern downtown needs

An impressive list of activities are forbidden in White Park of downtown Riverside, California, many of which are healthy outdoorsy stuff you might expect to be able to do in a park:

Click to enlarge.

• Roller Skates
• Roller Blades
• Scooters
• Bikes
• Skates or Skaters or perhaps SkateǷs using the obsolete letter Wynn from Old English

Gardening is also forbidden, usually identified as a healthy activity, but probably understandable in this context. ;) And how about Smoking affixed amongst the healthy stuff as an edit?

I am somewhat astounded by the omission of No Loitering. Perhaps it’s assumed.

Interesting too that the logo for the park has a closed gate on it. Here’s the actual entrance:

Click to enlarge.

Also at the entrance is this historical marker:

Click to enlarge.

White Park
– 1883 –

Named for Albert S. White, a city park commissioner who championed its development, White Park was Riverside’s first park. Established by private donations of land and labor, and set in town center in the tradition of the Spanish plaza, the park was deeded to the city in 1889. Reflecting the Victorian philosophy of eclectic and exotic plantings in park design, White Park has maintained its original character while adapting to modern downtown needs.

Cultural Heritage Board Landmark No. 57, City of Riverside.

Modern downtown needs apparently do not include getting any exercise in an ostensibly public park, unless it consists of promenading both modestly and discreetly, all the while careful not to break an indelicate sweat.

Welcome to The No No Project!

This is the “soft release” period for The No No Project website and blog. While there is no planned “official” start date, we should be revving up to speed in the next few weeks.

For more details about the Project, check out the About page — the quick version goes like this:

The No No Project is a tongue-in-cheek look at the supreme effort governments and businesses exert to make healthy activities verboten. The idea came to me after I began to notice just how many signs there are around forbidding things like bicycling, skating, standing, walking — all quite healthy activities that get you outdoors, moving and breathing.

Here’s a good simple example from the local Del Taco:

Click for larger

The usual No Soliciting and the vague No Loitering (which is, what? sitting and standing?) are used, but then there’s the seemingly ubiquitous anti-skating provision, here aimed at the equipment with No Skateboards.

Sometimes instead of equipment, the signs go after the activity itself:

Click for larger

By the way, that “CPC 602.5″ refers to a section of the California Penal Code specifically dealing with Trespassing, namely:

…aggravated trespass punishable by imprisonment in a county jail for not more than one year or by a fine of not more than one thousand dollars ($1,000), or by both that fine and imprisonment.

Good times.

In other cases, signs do away with words all but entirely:

Click for larger

The Redlands City Ordinance 62104b mentioned has this to say:

It is unlawful for any person to ride upon any bicycle, roller skate or skates, skateboard, or other contrivance upon any sidewalk within any business district within the city of Redlands, except for authorized law enforcement personnel of the city. Business district means any business district as defined by section 235 of the California Vehicle Code.

So yeah, keep your wheels off the sidewalks.

Making skateboarding a de facto illegal activity has been protested against loudly and thoroughly across the country, but it’s going to take a ton of time and local activism to change attitudes, much less laws. In towns like Redlands or San Bernardino, which offer relatively few activities for teens, this becomes even more difficult.

Something else to think about while we document the anti-aerobic bureaucracies.

Coming Soon!

Coming soon: The No No Project. Chronicling the Anti-Aerobic Conspiracy.